Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Everybody hates queries at some point - Part One

Wanna know what one of the most often asked about topics coming from writers is? Queries.

Most writers I know have, at one point or another, cursed, spit, shouted and cried about queries. They're the Valentine we send to agents and editors, screaming LOVE ME, damn it. My book. Here's my book. I've spent so much of my time, my dreams pouring myself into the pages and you are going to spend exactly 81 seconds before going "nah, not my thing," and move on.

Well... I think it's time to admit we have a problem, writers. Do you know why queries suck?

They're not our passion. They're not our book, our story, the thing that makes us tingle when we think about it on the drive home, waiting to slam open the lid to the laptop, or flip on the monitor, or for you sadists who write with a pad and pen, that.

I have a secret I'm willing to share. The first of what I hope are many.


Queries CAN suck, but they can also be made easier, and make you stand out.

The first trick assumes you are a writer who works well with characterization. If not, stay tuned, I'll probably get around to one of the other strengths in a while, but with the holidays coming up, who knows when that'll be, so pay attention.

So let's say you are good at letting people know this guy's a dirtbag, or that girl is wounded and needs someone to make it all better, and you can do that in about three lines of dialogue. This is for you.

Treat the query as a character.

Now, that doesn't mean you should write in first person. That's a bold move, and not one a lot of people agree on. Most agents and editors I have seen comment on this say don't do it. Then they actually take people who do (Because honestly, the biggest draw is if it's good. If you are that good at writing a query, all bets are off, and why are you wasting time and bandwidth reading this? Go be famous already.)

The query should be another character without a name. Your story is its back story. Don't tell me what happens. That exists between the pages, or maybe cut and dry in the synopsis, where those standout hooks don't have to catch an eye in the amount of time it takes to warm up a latte in the microwave.

There's love in your pages. Your love, and it bleeds out when you show how someone feels. There's no reason a query can't do that.

Here's an example that I just made up:

Dino has always wanted to see space. His dream is to be an astronaut, and when he gets a call from space camp, he can't wait to go.

Sure, it tells you what Dino wants, right? Boring!


Ever since Dino was a little boy, he knew he had to fly. Space was out there, calling to him. He was going to be an astronaut, no matter what, so when the space center called and told him he'd been admitted into their program, Dino was already on top of the world.

Which one reads better? Which one do you want to pick up, regardless of whether or not you care about space?

Go... Write a query. Practice on an idea that's NOT your book. Maybe that will help you see the differences you can't see because you're tooclose.

Thursday, October 10, 2013

Storytelling: An Unfortunate Series of Events

Have you ever tried to plot a story?

It usually ends up being a series of interconnected events that charge the story onward until that final THE END moment where you expect the reader will stand up, slap the book closed, with a heavy breath and go "OH MY GOD" (Insert other deity or whatever you happen to believe in) and then follow it up with phone calls to the nearest 87 relatives telling them about what an awesome book they just read.

And stop...

So that is unlikely to happen, for many reasons, but that's not the topic of this blog post.

If you're anything like me, you may try to see that as a story. Sorry friends, that one has jumped up and bitten me on the ass so hard I have trouble sitting down to write.

Think back a minute. Storytellers, the good ones, didn't get a bunch of people around a campfire and go on about shrimp tacos, shrimp grits, shrimp fritters, and the like until the defining moment.

They were showmen (and women) and they livened it up. They brought the characters to life within themselves. The plot didn't happen. It came alive, through inflection, faces, dramatic effect.

Well, you're a writer, so you don't have any of that stuff available to you, though I welcome you to make all the funny faces you want for the pictures on your back covers.

What you do have, and the point of this post, is to explain HOW it should come together. A series of events are like the bones of a plot. You need meat on them, ligaments to connect them together, and then ultimately, the biggest draw is how you present it, the skin, the part that everyone can see, though they may not agree completely on what is inside (And that's a good thing. It gets people talking).

To sum up, what I am striving toward, and what I'd like other writers to do is to make sure they have more than event A >> event B >> event C.

If it feels stilted to you, it probably is. No, this doesn't mean give me explosions, incest and drama on every page. Good God... The Little Engine That Could doesn't need that crap. What you do need is to make sure that people are following along for the ride, with the characters, right there waiting to know what happens next.

Set the scene. Let them know the smell of the wind, the color of the girl's hair in front of the boy. The way that an ice cream truck's jingle makes the old man feel right before he knows he's going to die.

Then you have the reader hooked, and once you've done that, the game begins. Writing is a game. It's where you play with the reader's heart, and you make all the rules save one. They can close it at any time. Make them pick it back up, not out of a feeling of accomplishment of getting through your 900 page tome, but because they rush back to it, wanting to see, and smell and be that character, or be with them.

Monday, July 29, 2013

Voice and other indescribable things

So let me start by saying everybody likes to talk about voice when it comes to writing. It's one of those intangible things that makes everybody stand up and take notice, but not everybody seems to have a grasp of what voice is.

In reality, it's more than one thing.

Characters have a voice. If they don't, then everybody you write is the same person: You, but a poor copy of you.

Distance yourself from your characters. You can share traits with them, feel their pain, revel in their joy, but the bigger, more important thing to consider is how the reader will do all those things.

You should be able to write a person who disagrees with your world views without becoming a caricature of that perspective.

It is not easy, but how do you create a reprehensible villain without being one yourself? Which... by the way brings me to a quick side note. Reprehensible villains are great for Disney. They make for stilted fiction.

Give the villain a cause, a reason to be, otherwise they are simply twisting their mustache while chaining the hero to the train tracks. Most evil things don't think they are evil. Maybe they don't care. Maybe their morality is twisted onto a different plane. For an example, see Damon on The Vampire Diaries. He's done some nasty crap. People love him.

Back to the original point, however.

The next type of voice is the author's voice. This is where you, as the creator of works of fiction, straight from your imagination and into pixels and pages, get to shine. You have a way with your words that is hopefully your own.

Sure, you may emulate a famous author, to some degree, but you should strive to be yourself. Learn from yourself as much as you learn from others. Pick up hints as to how to make your writing better, but trust in your inner voice to shine and when you hear the same thing over and over again, work to make your voice better, clearer, and work out your style.

Beta readers, critique partners, they may try to change you toward their own style, and in some ways, finding a compromise could work, but you have to be true to yourself... that is, unless you suck.

If you do, don't worry. We have all sucked at writing. Some of us still suck at some aspects of writing. No one person is all things. No one character is all things.

Write. Improve. Edit.